In the mid 1960’s a few parenting “experts” began to question whether we ought to say this word to our children.
Some worried that it would damage kids’ self-concepts. Others seemed concerned that it would stifle creativity.
Kids need to hear “No” from time to time.
Listed below are some practical guidelines:
• Say “No” only when you can back it up with meaningful actions.
• When we say “no” without holding our children accountable, we teach them that “no” really means “yes.”
• Say “No” only when you can do so without anger and frustration.
• Kids love to challenge us just to see our face turn red!
• Say “No” only when it doesn’t rob your child of a good learning experience.
• If a child is about to do something that’s not dangerous…but will backfire for them…it’s often wiser to allow them to learn from their mistake instead of saying “No.”
“No” is a critically important parenting tool that wears out if it’s used too often. Save it for times it’s really needed.
Dr. Charles Fay
©2009 Jim Fay, Charles Fay, Ph.d.& Love and Logic® Institute
As author of the easy-to-read “Save Your Sanity” series, Kerry helps parents save their sanity and sense of humor while raising young children with love and laughter.