Raising Boys Made Me Braver

[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”3.22″][et_pb_row column_structure=”3_5,2_5″ _builder_version=”3.25″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” custom_padding=”||2px|||”][et_pb_column type=”3_5″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”3.27.4″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat”]

When I learned that all of my children were going to be boys, I didn’t know that I was being invited to breathe life into new parts of myself.

Back when my adult life was just hypothetical, I was sure I’d have daughters. As a child, I loved dolls, crafts, quilting and sewing, doing hair, cooking and baking. It was obvious that I was meant to raise girls.

But when the daughters I thought I would have never showed up and my three darling sons had limited interest in learning those skills, I needed a new mantra: “If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.” It wasn’t my instinct to splash and climb and run when you can walk. Some of those things were scary and risky. But my choice was clear: do whatever it took to BE with my beloved sons. So I committed to splashing and running. I embraced “dinosaur wars,” car play and building stuff.

 

[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”2_5″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_image src=”/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/ThisIsNotADressRehersal.jpg” _builder_version=”4.4.3″][/et_pb_image][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.4.3″ _dynamic_attributes=”content” text_font=”||on||||||” text_text_color=”#8499d9″ text_font_size=”22px” text_letter_spacing=”3px” quote_text_align=”left” quote_text_color=”#8499d9″ text_orientation=”right” border_width_right=”4px” border_color_right=”#8499d9″]@ET-DC@eyJkeW5hbWljIjp0cnVlLCJjb250ZW50IjoicG9zdF9leGNlcnB0Iiwic2V0dGluZ3MiOnsiYmVmb3JlIjoiIiwiYWZ0ZXIiOiIiLCJ3b3JkcyI6IiIsInJlYWRfbW9yZV9sYWJlbCI6IiJ9fQ==@[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row column_structure=”1_2,1_2″ _builder_version=”4.4.3″][et_pb_column type=”1_2″ _builder_version=”4.4.3″][et_pb_image src=”/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/DSC07055.jpg” _builder_version=”4.4.3″ custom_padding=”||||false|false” hover_enabled=”0″][/et_pb_image][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_2″ _builder_version=”4.4.3″][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.4.3″ custom_padding=”45px|||||”]

There were times when having all boys felt overwhelming. Sometimes I longed for the quiet, calm play that I knew from my own childhood. Honestly, I had to grieve the loss of my long-held fantasy about raising girls. Living with boys stretched me outside of my comfort zone. I marveled at how much noise and movement came with these kids. But now I feel so grateful for what they brought out in me.

 

[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.4.3″ custom_margin=”-52px|auto||auto||”][et_pb_column _builder_version=”4.4.3″ type=”4_4″][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.4.3″ hover_enabled=”0″ custom_padding=”0px|||||”]

 

Last week, I tromped up a steep, slick, snowy hill in the mountains, flung my body across an inner tube and barreled down at break-neck speed, screaming and laughing. I could FEEL those parts of me that have come to life because of being a boy-mom. As a mother of 3 boys and stepmother of 2 more, I have had to call up the intrepid, courageous, and active parts of me that, up until motherhood, had laid somewhat dormant. Thanks to my boys being who they are, I have developed entirely new skill sets. I can jump out of an airplane, catch a football, hold an iguana, and camp in the snowy mountains, to name just a few. I have claimed my inner rough ’n tumble, fearless, edgy parts. I can roll with the punches and take much bigger risks. And because of that, I feel more fully alive.

[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]

Share:

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Most Popular

Get The Latest Updates

Subscribe To Our Weekly Newsletter

No spam, notifications only about new products, updates.
.
On Key

Related Posts

Mom holding toddler during a tantrum

What Vexes Parents

A friend and talk show host asked me this week what 5 issues vex most parents. That’s a pretty big question! I’m going to share

Mom with kids walking in the woods

Self-care, self-love, and the art of parenting.

Chances are you have found that parenting stretches you in ways you didn’t see coming. I’m betting that you want your children to feel absolutely loved, cherished, and adored by you, down to their core.

Let's Get Together

Please request a free Discovery Call with one of us.

Kerry Stutzman MSW, LMFT

My passion is helping my clients develop close, connected families and healthy relationships. For the past 20 years I have been helping people discover the best version of themselves.  Learn more

Brett King LPCC NCC, MFT

My specialty is couples therapy with parents. I also have expertise in parenting, betrayal recovery, and addiction.  Learn more

Debbie Bassett MA, LPCC, MFTC

My focus includes trauma, attachment, anxiety, depression, and relational work; including a focus on children and teens, parents, and couples.  Learn more

Amy Cobb - Parent Coach

Amy Cobb MS Family/Human Development

I specialize in working with parents and caregivers with children from cradle to college, with special focus from birth – 10 years old. Learn more

Session Request with Debbie

I look forward to meeting with you.

Discovery Call Request with Kerry

My practice is quite full, however I am accepting new clients if I feel there is a good fit and I can be helpful.  Please share what brings you to seek therapy at this time.

I look forward to discovering if we are a good fit.

Discovery Call Request with Debbie

I look forward to discovering if we are a good fit.

Discovery Call Request with Brett

I look forward to discovering if we are a good fit.

Welcome Back

If you are an established client, please click on your therapist/parent coach to access their online booking portal.